Friday, July 17, 2009

Forgive me, blogland..

I haven't felt much like blogging recently as I've been working my ass off at the new store. Everything is almost total chaos right now as we train associates and re-organize merchandise, I don't even know what my schedule is for next week which stresses me out but I'm trying *really* hard to be patient about it all..
And I'm feeling a whole lot of discouragement about the ttc thing. My random 6 days of spotting turned out be neither ovulation related nor implantation related as my temp dropped and I have now had two days of ewcm, all excitement that came with the first day of having it has dissipated. (My chart is here if you care to look: http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/26f39d) Now I just feel like my body is screwing with me.. I finally sucked it up and had sex last night for the first time since my uti, I think I felt safer since I started taking cranberry supplements yesterday. So, I'd like to be excited and think that it might be O-time soon and I possibly had sex at a very good time but I'm sure it's just nothing, like it always is. I'll give it another few days and then I'll probably start the birth control pills..
I couldn't even bear to watch A Baby Story today and you know I'm feeling pretty crappy if I can't watch that!
These past few days I've just felt like all my worries are weighing me down (usually I'm good at hiding them from myself so they don't bother me constantly), I've been really bummed about my grandpa and about our house and my whacked out body and I just can't seem to shake them. I'm sure this is a passing phase, and hopefully soon I'll feel motivated and positive again, like I usually do..

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